Yesterday was National Hot Dog Day, and we were so busy stuffing our faces that we forgot to mention it. This morning a prompt memo arrived in our inbox from the National Hot Dog & Sausage Council (hereafter referred to as the NHDSC), who organized the celebration, notifying us of this tragic oversight. To make everything better and appease the NHDSC, we’ve assembled this strangely appetizing listicle of 20 Gross Hot Dogs, enjoy!

Hot Dog Octopus

Because really, who’s to say there isn’t octopus meat in hot dogs?

The Hot Dog Tattoo

Strangely, wrinkles and loses color more quickly than a real hot dog.

The Dog Hot Dogs

Funny, they don’t seem to get the joke.

Zombie Hot Dog

I smell a B-movie horror plot cooking.

Hot Dog-Shaped Hot Dog Stand

Food fights among employees with mustard and ketchup are strongly encouraged.

The Hot Dog Quesadilla

The next logical step.

The Hot Dog Phone

With a direct line to the NHDSC industry mascot…

The Hot Dog Mascot

When properly lathered with condiments, proceeds to eat itself (images unavailable).

Hot Dog on a Stick Breaded with French Fries

Endorsed by the NHDSC’s radical Slow Food faction because it prohibits super-fast eating.

Hot Dog the Movie (1984)

A deliciously cheesy 80s frat comedy about winter sports (click image for trailer).

Super-Long Hot Dog

World record-holder for longest hot dog.

Knit Hot Dog

Great bate for catching hot dog burglar.

The Hot Dog Hat

Make wearer look super-smart and hot, not unlike…

The Hot Dog Costume

We’d love to spread relish all over those buns.

The Hot Dog Giant

Stomps around the Midwest giving hot dogs to those in need.

The Giant Hot Dog

Floats tantalizingly out of reach, taunting the starving masses below.

The Fish Hot Dog

With extra batter on the deep-fried fish so you don’t lose any of the fat.

Dog-Shaped Hot Dog Cooker

Somehow this seems inappropriate.

The Oscar Mayer Wiener Hot Dog Car

Runs on premium unleaded mustard.

The Hot Dog Horse

Caption contest! Our entry: “Quick, follow that bun!” Submit yours below.