As we’ve reported in previous editions of our weekly psychoanalysticle Freudian Fridays, phallic forms are among the most potent and clearly legible symbols of power in our patriarchal capitalist society. Though it’s strategically dangerous to represent phallic power with an actual penis (which is perpetually vulnerable and, by and large, not that impressive), elongated objects invested with real and/or symbolic strength make the perfect phallic symbols (this is how women can be phallic too).

With our historical penchant towards wars, weapons also serve as a simple shorthand for strength, might and all manner of macho mumbo-jumbo. Not surprisingly, then, there are innumerable weapons of phallic power in pop culture, but for this edition of Freudian Fridays we’ve boiled them all down to the following 9 Phallic Fictional Weapons.

Rambo’s Machine Gun

Proving that the American military wasn’t symbolically castrated by defeat in Vietnam, Rambo fires off rounds in orgasmic elation.

Big Swords in King Arthur

As Lancelot (Richard Gere) plainly states in this clip, the way to win a swordfight is to be the only one with a sword.

Orgazmo’s Orgazmo Gun

A little literal, perhaps, but you get the idea.

Jason’s Machete in Friday the 13th (which is today!)

Even when turned into a burning man and pitted against that other great moral reformer Freddie Kruger, mothering victim Jason Voorhees’s machete punishes the promiscuous and substance-abusing teens of his time.

Star Wars’s Light Sabers

In a brilliantly Freudian initiation rite, Luke cannot become a man until he masters the dangerous weapon his powerful father once wielded.

Star Trek’s Phasers

A weapon for a slightly subtler space epic, check out Jean-Luc Picard and William T. Riker double teaming that dude in the chair.

Scarface’s “Little Friend”

A man’s only as big as the gun he carries.

Loc Dog’s Truck Missile in Dont Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood

Way better way to overcome social and economic castration than to keep a gun in your pants and a nuclear missile in your U-Haul?

Zorg’s ZF-1 from The Fifth Element

Interestingly, this gun is both extremely phallic and yonic. After all, what is the net it casts at the end of Zorg’s demo if not a giant envelopping vagina?