In what is perhaps the most brilliant anti-gentrification performance art-as-protest achievement ever, a serial arsonist has been lighting luxury condo construction site porta-potties ablaze (pictured at right) all over the rapidly developing Russian Hill neighborhood of San Francisco.

As if news of this hilarious and brilliant string of anti-gentrification vandalism wasn’t enough, one foreman has reacted to the series of crimes with a sneaky solution: he’s camouflaged the porta-potty at his construction site. While his description of the dissimulation process seems rather uncreative – plywood, blankets, nothing fancy – clearly much more could be done to make porta-potties creative, interesting and secure street furniture instead of the urban eyesores they are now. After the jump see our suggestions for aesthetic and security improvements, Listicles’ 12 Cleverly Protected Porta-Potties.

The Invisible Cube Porta-Potty

The Rudimentary Wood-Paneled Porta-Potty

The Emergency Take-Off Porta-Potty

(programmed to return to take-off site 30 minutes after attempted arson attack)

The Out-of-Reach Towering Porta-Potty

(comes with detachable ladder, lookout window optional)

The Tropical Paradise Porta-Potty

The Hidden Behind Masks Porta-Potties

(generally more effective in non-desert locations)

The iPotty

(iPod dock inside lets you play your own music and videos)

The Mobile Porta-Potty

(speed away when arsonists approach, takes diesel)

The Vintage London Phone Booth Porta-Potty

The Virtual Porta-Potty

(only vulnerable to Second Life arsonists)

The Air-Lift Porta-Potty

(helicopter team follows your every move at a safe altitude, lowers porta-potty only when needed)

The End of an Abandoned Bridge Project Porta-Potty

The Porta-Potty Protected by Adult Male Lion

(comes with six month supply of lion food, do not let lion drink from toilet bowl)